Why I like Patton Oswalt.

Before the interview I got into a Sour Look Fight with these two old biddies. Here’s why. The manager put on this “Classic Tunes No One Wants to Listen To, Ever, Only They’re Played by Meth Addicts on Toy Instruments and Mop Buckets”. And one of them is the “Wedding March”. No, really. The fucking “Wedding March”, which people don’t even play at weddings anymore. Imagine listening to it while you’re trying to read NEW AVENGERS. I ask you. So I beg the guy -- his name’s Nelson, and he’s really cool -- if he could maybe put on, you know, ANYTHING except the “Wedding March”. So he puts on Enya, which, compared to the “Wedding March”, is like trading being punched for being yelled at. And these two biddies near the window call the poor bastard over, and I hear, “Is THAT a regular customer?” And Nelson says, well, yeah, he comes in every Wednesday. And they look over at me -- this dumpy, mental patient-looking dude with a pile of comics in front of him and a pot of Assam -- and I guess they decide they don’t want to be followed home and skinned, but they give me these sour, old biddie looks which I’m sure shaved three years off my life. That’s right, you little alternative edge-walkers: I stared down two spinsters at a tea room while reading comics. Who wants to have a push-up contest?”]

I think I've read more interviews with him than I've actually heard or seen his stand up...
but just reading this interview...
well, it cheers me up.

Found via Warren Ellis (I think...)